Justifications for Walking Backwards
(listed in order of least-to-most embarrassing)
- You're encouraging a small child/dog to follow
- You're dragging a heavy suitcase
- You're walking in front of Jack, who has a penchant for "small hiney pinches" (small qualifying the size of the pinch, not the hiney--he's an equal opportunity pincher)
- For a glute workout
- You split your pants
- You split your pants while wearing cutesy, ice-cream scoop underwear
- You split your pants while wearing no underwear at all
- Your head is on backwards
